Ok lemme start with saying that I am loving writing with Penzu.com. It is
awesome I guess. The Journal gives me a feeling of my own personalised diary
where I just have to make my keypad get turned into a pen and my laptop as
notebook. Yes I have met with my perfect mate in writing few days back and that's
penzu.com.
I just heard that my relatives are too excited to know when
they are going to listen my wedding bells.
What? did you just say "Marriage"?? |
I don't understand this
pathetic universal truth as why are outsiders so worried about the inside
story? I mean everybody knows what happens after marriage.Yes I do believe
every coin has two faces but then they will be the ones who will be much more
interested to make fun about the other side of the coin. They will be the ones
giving numbers of so called self proclaimed babajis to know what is wrong inside
the marriages and would certainly suggest your parents to just go and meet them
once. And trust me that one meeting will turn into number of meetings until
they find a solution to that. They would just not understand the one bitter
truth of life that at the end of the day it is all about time which changes!!
Yes I do understand that parents are always worried about their children but I
don't understand what is the point of letting your neighbours, your father's
uncle's aunt's so called brother in law worry about this?
I know the typical answer is when the children grow up and get
settled down in their respective careers, they also need to get settled down
into a personal life and for that getting married is what is required. Well I
again don't understand that does "settling down" actually means marriage? I feel
getting married is like again throwing yourself for another two to three
years into the same world of getting settled. Yes that's true. I have seen
couples struggling for getting settled down after marriage. Then how does this
word getting settled down actually fits with getting settled down in a marriage and that too
with an unknown person whom you even can't predict at the initial stage. How
does spending lakhs and crores of rupees in just letting people know someone is
getting married guarantee a perfect life or a settled life?
My idea of getting married is a little bit different. I think a
guy or girl needs to literally get tired of what he or she loves to do in the
initial years of his or her career or what they have dreamt of doing when
they were just studying and dreaming of getting their dream job. They
might have dreamt of going for a perfect holiday with their friends with their
first salary or they might be having plans of buying an apartment for their
parents or anything else. Let them just fulfil their dreams
because a dream is not just about getting what you wanted desperately. It is
about living with what you wanted desperately. Let them spend their money and
time in doing what they always wanted to do. Set them free for sometime,
atleast for the sake of letting them know that you only live once and life is
not just about making the ends meet. There is much more between those two ends.
There is a life to live in between those two ends and you gotta grab that life
with both of your hands and fill your packets with the opportunities you get in
between. Opportunity to live life to the fullest, opportunity to make people
happy, opportunity to feel happy and satisfied. Just lots and lots of
opportunities.
Moreover when it comes to marriage how can one even think about
that idea of a " five to thirty minutes" of meeting and taking the life time
decision. Marriage is a life time decision and taking the decision only on the
basis of birth- charts and by just trusting on some self- proclaimed
learned people of the society, is it worth calling a marriage or is it going to
be just a deal ? An agreement and some arrangements to announce the procedure
of making the grown-ups "settled
down" after
spending lakhs of rupees and making the pockets of wedding planners heavy in
just one day and few hours.
I just have few questions to ask from everybody, I mean from all
the parents and especially my dooor ke well-wishers, can't you just
allow us to atleast come out from the shell and see the world before making
this big decision? Can you please allow us to be mature enough to atleast decide what kind of partner we need and we think we will be able to settle down
with? Can you please let us think after that five to thirty minutes of
meeting and decide
whether we need few more five to thirty minutes? And above all please give
yourself some time to sit and relax. Free yourself from your responsibilities
and think that life is much more beyond just finishing off the remaining work
and then go to char-dham ki yatra. It's about enjoying that free
time with your children and feeling proud on what your children have achieved after those years of hard-work. It is about making your children understand how
to choose a perfect life partner and then let them decide because at the end
they have to life their part of lives and face the after effects of that one
minute of yes or no. Yes family plays a big role in
this decision but I am just asking all the worried parents to just settle down
in their process of finishing their responsibilities and let their children
grow mature enough to embrace a new relationship.
We all need to get settled down in our respective lives but this
is really important to define and decide what we actually mean by getting
settled down. Is it just getting a better paid job, a better home to live and a
partner to live with? I feel it is much more beyond that. For me settling down
starts when I start fulfilling my childhood dreams one by one after I became
capable of achieving or just doing the. Like visiting a new place once in every
month after I get my salary, watching a new movie every week when I don't have
tensions of my exams. taking my family out for dinner and paying for them,
taking out time to write and express without any worries, taking out time to
plan a party with friends or buy a gift for my loved ones and living life to the fullest. Life is much more
than just getting settled down. It is about not settling down , it is about
flying high and higher with your feet on the ground. Marry when you actually
want to. Marry when you actually start dreaming a life with a partner , a
perfect partner. Don't marry because it is just a part of the so called
procedure of "settling down" into your respective lives.
I always feel life is too short to do big things, do it now and
that's why I decided to write my first book on love and relationship.
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