Happy New Year !!! (Is it Over??)

Few more days to go and we will enter into a new year of our respective lives. All of us might be starting with new hopes, new desires, new resolutions, new wishes and non other than memories of past.

I wish we could have a clear conversations or clear memory option which we could apply on every first of  January. It would have been much easier to enter into a new year and start with new hopes and desires.

I wish entering into a new year could have been like stepping into a new home and doing "Grih Pravesh" and leaving behind the old home and forgetting the address as well.

I wish starting a new year could have been as exiting as starting a new level of "Mario" or "candy crush" or unlocking a new weapon in "Zombie" and I wish we could have felt as proud as we feel while unlocking a new stage in the game.

I wish entering into new year could have been like entering into the transparent wall as we used to watch in "Harry Potter movies" or "Shaka Laka Boom Boom-the Hindi version of the same" or the movie "Abra-Ka-Dabra" again the Hindi version of the same, leaving behind the school room and facing the new world of challenges.

The Last Kiss

The last Kiss

20/01/2014- My b’day

Our love was perpetual but we were not destined to be together. He was getting married and we were together for the last time. I was sitting beside him letting the chilled air touch my face and dry my tears.

“I love you so much Aman. I can’t see my future without you”. I Said.

Tears rolled out of my eyes as I embraced him. I felt helpless and closed my eyes giving him permission to award me with the most pleasant and the last b’day gift.

He held me tight and planted a kiss on my left cheek; I held him tighter as if I wanted more to come. Slowly his lips moved towards mine. He leaned towards me and I shivered out of excitement as he kissed my upper lip. Leisurely the moment I slipped my hands inside his shirt, he rewarded me with the most pleasant gift of my life.

“We kissed each other.”

I hugged him again and couldn’t stop myself from breaking into tears. He knew the reason behind that and allowed me to rest on his chest for the last time and then he left forever.

 (Awarded with first prize in a short story contest with words limit 150-200..

 Finally made it to write the feeling in 198 words. Well the inspiration was real so couldn't stop from expressing in few words as well. 

Looking forward to express in unlimited word counts and with unending emotions "You Promised .......... " and the suspense continues)

To the girl who cannot hear me now !!

 11 November 2014, 3:00 PM

If I had to choose to give an award to the best development of the decade then I would definitely choose “Delhi Metro”. Life has become so easy now. Few years back when people used to think twice before leaving for Delhi because of the pathetic “Bus Journey” or so now the employed ones don’t even think a second time to commute from Delhi to Gurgaon and vice-a-versa. I personally prefer metro over any other mode of transport to travel to Delhi. Reasons could be the comfort level and the other one is none other than watching the amazing creativity of god. I wonder how many courses of architecture god must have done or might be he must have done a double PhD in creativity before making human being. Damnn!! And the best part is DMRC had given the first bogie to the most beautiful creations in the world…Girls!!. Intelligent DMRC hann!!

The best part of boarding metro from Huda City Centre is you get plenty of empty seats and you can choose the most comfortable one. My priority always remains the same, the one near the charger point where I can charge my phone and take a nap as well. But the girlsss ufff!! They actually can never let you sleep in the ladies boogie. It is not that I take interest in their never ending gossips but I love looking at girls with different kind of gestures at every point of time. I love watching their funky dressing sense and at times the most decent ones. Some of them are truly admirable and some of them are ahh god is listening so no gossips!!! Make-ups, perfumes, short dresses, long dresses, short and silky hairs, long hairs and so on. Poor boys they don’t have the access to the same till the journey ends!!

It was a wonderful morning when I had to leave for Civil Lines for some departmental work and I decided to board the metro than going by car. After completing the work I left from Civil Lines and boarded the metro towards Huda City Center, Gurgaon. It was an afternoon with huge rush in the metro. With no other option I had to board the train and hence I took the ladies compartment which is always decent enough to stand.

“Rajeev Chowk Metro Station we are sorry for the delay but due to technical problem the train stops here”

What the f***. I mean I was already late and now this metro uff!! And on the head of that the whole Delhi rushed towards the other metro which was supposed to take the passengers further.

Ahh!! and another one…”Patel Chowk Metro Station due to technical fault the train is stopped here, we apologize for the inconvenience”..That’s so nice of you my darling DMRC!!! I am happy atleast you accepted your mistake.

The doors of the metro were open and we were able to feel the cool breeze when a boy came running in front of me. “You know what a girl jumped in front of the train and committed suicide”.

A sudden wave of current passed through my body.

What would have been the reason of taking such a painful decision of life?

What all she must be going through which led to ending up the life like that?

Why didn't she share that with anyone else?

It could be possible that the matter was small but she could not handle the stress!!

How could a person be daring enough to throw him /herself in front of a train?

Was that the only option left with the girl?

And thousands of questions filled my mind along with the pain which the parents might be feeling after listening to the news.

I am still stuck at the last question. I am no one to judge anyone and I might not be aware of the situation of that girl when she committed suicide but generally thinking over the suicide rates of the country, have we lost our patience to deal with the situation of our lives which leads to taking such harsh decisions? How easy or how hard it would have been for that girl to commit suicide can never be judged but what about the people whom she has left behind crying for her. The biggest and irreversible loss if anyone could have is the loss of life and that’s what happened that day.

I know she cannot hear my voice now. I even don’t know the name of that girl and I pray may her soul rest in peace but I would like to pass on few words to her:

To my unknown friend,

“I am not asking you to count the number of people who loved you but if you would have looked back and thought for a while about the lady who took the pain of whole nine months to bring you in this beautiful world you might not have committed suicide.”

“I am not asking you to count the number of people who loved you but if you would have looked back to remember the hands which made you stand on your feet you might not have committed suicide.”

“I am not asking you to count the number of people who loved you but if you would have looked back to remember the small fights which you might have done with your siblings and then loved them for the same, you might not have committed suicide.”

“I am not asking you to count the number of people who loved you but if you would have looked back to remember you special friends who made you realize how beautiful you are you might not have committed suicide”

 “I am not asking you to count the number of people who loved you but if you would have looked back and recall the beautiful moments of your beautiful life than the worst moments you might not have committed suicide.”

“I am still not sure what made you take the biggest decision of your life and ending up the life like that but if you would have shared your worries with any one of the people who loved you, you might not have committed suicide.”

“I am not sure who made you take this decision but if you would have been brave enough to fight back, you might not have committed suicide”

But anyway Well Done Girl!!

You gave a reason to people to talk behind your back.

You gave a reason to the people to cry for you.

You gave a reason for your family to meet for a cause.

You made someone realize how incomplete life becomes without the loved one.

You made someone realize the pain of emptiness in life.

You made someone strong enough to handle the pain of losing you.

You made someone realize the importance of loved ones and now everybody will fear from losing theirs.

I am still not aware of the reason and pain which you might be suffering from but still I am also not sure why you didn't look back!!

Your unknown friend…

   

Kiss of Love Vs Confusion of Love

Once my grandma told me story which I remember after reading the “kiss of love” issue and it goes like this:

Once upon a time a father and his son decided to go to some place together along with a camel. The father insisted to his son to ride on camel and he will walk on the sand. While they were crossing a village, the villagers started commenting on the two of them saying what kind of son is he? He has no respect for his father. How could he let his father walk while he is riding a camel? After listening to villager’s comments the son came down and asked his father to ride the camel to which father agreed and hence they left the village. After crossing that village they entered another village. The moment villagers saw a father riding the camel and son walking on sand they started commenting, what kind of father is he has let his son walk over the hot sand and is comfortable while riding the camel. He is so shameless. Both the father and son were in dilemma now. Whom to listen?? What to do??

Moral of the story: No matter what you are doing, the society finds a way out to criticize you, even if it is good or bad for you or for them!!

The Kiss of love scene:

Have you people ever witnessed a couple or just two friends out of whom one was a male and another one was female who got harassed by the local police or any political party. Kerala case, Hyderabad case and none other than the valentine day’s cases can never be forgotten where the political parties and policemen beats up or harass the couples who even sit together in the parks or are seen anywhere dating or holding hands together.

Do you know why they have such a power and are able to snatch from us our fundamental right of equality?

First One is section 294(a) of the IPC which states  that "Whoever, to the annoyance of others, does any obscene act in any public place shall be punished with imprisonment for a term which may extend to three months, or with fine, or with both. 

Truth behind the section: The meaning of the word 'obscene' is not given in Indian Penal Code, hence it is interpreted differently by different authorities. 

And this is the reason most of the youngsters are harassed for the sake of law by the policemen because policemen themselves are not clear about the law and according to their interpretation “Obscene Act” includes the act of couples holding hands or dating in public. On the other hand maximum youngsters are unaware of the law and get scared when any higher authority threatens them to charge.

Another reason for this is the moral values or the name sake of Indian Culture. I was shocked and surprised when the youngsters went against Modi ji’s statement and SC’s judgment of giving freedom to people for showing their love in public. For them this is against the Hindu culture/ Indian Culture/ Moral values etc etc. Can anyone please tell me where does the moral values of the youth goes when used condoms are found on the university’s/ any collage’s floors or when any girl gets raped by those valueless youngsters and other heinous crimes are attempted by our “moral value driven youngsters”. Where does their values and culture go when they do not hesitate in adopting western culture for their own benefits and leisure?

Ahh how sad is this that going out at night and hanging out with friends with bottle of beers, coming home late night and disrespecting the elders is totally cultural and comes under the “Hindu culture/Moral values”. Finding a hidden place and raping a girl is totally cultural…ohh how could I forget that it was not public, those innocent rapists did that in silence but please remind me of Nirbhaya case then!! . Sending parents at old age home comes under the practice of moral values, live-in relationships are just normal and cultural but my dear friend showing love in public is totally immoral. Please do not commit such a mistake in public otherwise this time police might not arrest you but “the moral value driven youngsters” might harm you!!

I want to ask the protesters who were against “kissing and showing love in public”, haven’t any one of them kissed their loved ones. Do all of them wake up early in the morning, goes to temple, touch their parent’s feet, comes to college, attend the class, goes to home, listen to bhajans, complete their studies and goes back to bed early at night.

I agree that showing love in public should be in limits but was that right to comment that “if you will kiss in public I will f*** your ******* in public”. Was the statement itself cultural enough? Where did your moral values go while commenting like that?

Intention of the law: Well according to me the intention of Supreme Court’s judgment was clear. SC and HC were against the inhuman behavior of policemen and political parties which goes totally against the youth and takes away from them their fundamental right of freedom. At times policemen, out of their hangover of power do not even accept the simple truth that the two of them might be actually married and just because they were unable to give any proof of their marriage they are harassed for the sake of power. I mean how illogical is this that in India whenever a married woman goes out with her husband, it is not out of custom or tradition that she has to put “sindoor” or wear a “mangalsootra”, but because police might arrest them or harass the two of them and put them into the jail for the sake of our culture.

Confusion of Love

This time the youth was actually confused whether to accept the new law or reject the same. I accepted it wholeheartedly and when asked by my colleagues, they accepted it when they wanted to show love but rejected the whole idea of their sisters being kissed in public. Well my dear friends please understand that the girls whom you will kiss in public would be someone or other’s sisters or daughters. Am I right while calling it still a male chauvinistic society?

This is not a protest against the SC’s judgment but confusion between culture and desire. We want to avail the freedom of expression which itself includes expressing love but we are confusing the same with our moral values or tradition.

Please answer some of my questions which are running in my mind:

Where the culture goes when a male policeman beats up a female in public?

Why don’t this youth talk about culture when they do not hesitate in commenting on the outfits of girls and harassing them?

Why the political parties are still quiet on the biggest crime on earth and that is raping a girl’s soul? Or have they started counting it as a trend/culture?

In a country where poverty and rising population are still one of the biggest issues how could political leaders and “over-thinkers of culture” find time to raise such an illogical issue?

How about raising the voices against Human-trafficking and prostitution or is it cultural cum traditional in the eyes of my budding politicians who are at present the “rockstars” of youth.

Well India is an over –legislative country and the only reason behind breaking the law is because of the over-lapping of law and ignorance of law. Maximum of us are not actually aware of many of the laws passed by the govt. from the past many years and even if they get to know about any one of them, they are ready to make an issue out of it. 

India needs some change. Adopting things blindly might be dangerous but adopting right things at the right time is the need of the hour. And the expectation from the youth is to be broad minded enough to accept the changes wholeheartedly.

My Slogan from today:


If you can’t be the change atleast let the change happen!!

This time burn your "Egos" not "Crackers"

Off from office for a whole week with a bonus which would allow me buy gifts for my family and a pretty gift which I am surely going to pass on to someone very special. Yippy!! And here comes the most awaited festival of the nation, Diwali. The only day for which we start preparing from the beginning of the month. Atleast this time, when it is falling at the end of the month we all must have enjoyed the pre-diwali days because our salaries got credited for the month to enjoy shopping. Our mothers would be busy with cleaning the houses, fathers would surely try to show to their beloved wives that they are busy in looking for discounts and replacing the old furniture with newer if they find something alluring. Girls like me would be busy in spending money for purchasing creative and decorative stuffs for the drawing room to impress the guests and make them say “wow” for the beautifully decorated house and brothers like mine would be busy in spoiling the decorations and feeling proud for the same. Above all how can children miss the opportunity of asking for new dresses and getting the same without listening to a single “No” for the festival day? The whole excitement of the Diwali season starts from the very beginning of the month with Navratra, Dusshhera, Karvachouth, Hoi-Ashtami and other festivals giving us the feeling of the arrival of the most awaited festival.  This time also I did not get a chance of enjoying the third one ;) Damn!!

Well no doubt Diwali had always been the brightest festival of all. Ofcourse the day when all of us are hopeful about the arrival of ‘Laxmi’ in our lockers always seems to be bright. Distributing and eating lots of sweets had always been the most favorite work for me on this day and I hope like the last many years my neighbors, friends and near and dear ones exchange the sweets this time as well with the same enthusiasm and warmth towards the relationships. But have you ever noticed that these festivals have turned out to be matter of materialism these days.  For almost 95 % of the population diwali is a synonym of dhoom-dhadaka and fireworks but have we ever tried to notice or realize the fireworks inside the hearts of our near and dear ones which must be burning all day and night due to one reason or other. Some of our loved ones must be angry because we did not make it to visit them or call them once in a while. Some of them must be burning because since the day we have entered into a new job our attitude towards them seems to have been changed. Some of them might be jealous of us and some might be just angry with no reason but out of ego or so called “self respect” and they would never take a step forward to shake hands or hug you, I mean to make it. It might be possible that this is just out of misunderstanding or mis- communication but again most probably we are also the victim of our egos.  We ourselves are not ready to take a step forward and tell the same to the person you love that no matter how much busy and how far you are you still remember the beautiful memories. On the contrary we expect the opposite person to put his/her shoes into our feet and realize by himself/herself.

Remember memories last forever and nothing can be a substitute of the day you lived with that particular loved one of your life. The memories could be of your childhood days, your teenage days, romantic days or so on. They could be you parents, siblings, friends, best friends, lovers or just colleagues. But every memory has its own space and we must respect that space.  

Well whenever I fall in such a situation the only song which runs into my mind is “Ek to kam zindgani uss pe bhi kam hai jawani pyar do, pyar lo!!”  

And the moment I realize this important and very serious truth about life, the very next moment I get ready to burn my ego and make it with the person I love or the one who is angry with me. I wonder when we have such a short life and so much work to do how can we give place to our egos in our hearts which is too small to be filled with love even. God has given us such a beautiful heart to love and on the contrary we allow our anger, ego, materialism, greed, selfishness and so many other negative emotions to enter into that. Our hearts are made to beat and feel the love with each and every second it beats. Just imagine the world with no worries, no anger, no hate and just love. I know the world would turn out to be diabetic then but some salt in love enhances its taste sometime. So why can't we make a dish out of love and if we are really interested in burning the crackers then please make the crackers out of ego so that when it bursts , your ego gets burned into the fire. 

People love spending their hard earned money in buying crackers and enjoy wasting the same by burning expensive crackers on the festival day. But they forget to burn their ego which illuminates inside them every day out of one reason or other for one person or other. Let’s just make a pledge to burn our egos this time and not crackers. Because  where on the one side burning the ego would lead to earning love and respect, on the other side we would definitely be losing money and of all peace of mind by burning crackers.

And if you are really a die heart fan of crackers then please do not forget to think about the poor families who find it hard to even make it for one day meal. If your money is screaming from your pockets to come out then please spend a part of it in making a  poor roadside child happy. Give him sweets, give him some crackers and bring some smile on the face of that child. Trust me this time you will fell the most special person of the earth. The pleasure of making someone smile is inexplicable. Just try it once and you will realize it by yourself. Make your maid happy by giving some good clothes to her and for her family so that she could make her day special as well and respect you for being so generous and kind to her. Allow her eat your home made food so that she could appreciate the good taste we enjoy every day. If your room is filled with lots of old stuffs, be it be books or toys or clothes try to distribute the same with the needy ones. Trust me this Diwali you would be getting many more blessings along with the blessings of your elders. Make your family members happy by bringing gifts for them with your salary or pocket money. Nothing could be the best utilization of money than this rather than spending them on crackers which would ultimately be converted into ashes and would lead to increase in all kinds of pollution.

As a good citizen of the country and as a responsible and rational human being let’s just pledge to say no to crackers and say yes to earning love, respect and care of all of our loved ones. Let’s just burn our egos and enlighten ourselves with honesty, modesty, love, respect, truthfulness and care as a good human being and fill other’s lives by bestowing the good deeds and giving them our utmost support and care to them. You never know one smile can benefit thousands of people if the same gets passed with each and every person you meet and that would be the best Diwali of your life. Let’s make this Diwali the best Diwali of our lives.  

Happy Diwali !!!

Work in your own way!!

  

Our lives are so busy in working for our bread and butter that we even forget to realize some simple truths and facts about work. We are so busy in this rat race that we have forgotten the real values and most importantly the ethics of working and dealing with a specific situation while working and while we are with the people with whom we work. Let's just stop here and look back. Just recall those management lessons we used to read and learn. Ok if you were not a management student just recall some of the articles you must have read somewhere while just surfing your net or reading a newspaper or while reading a magazine or it could be any other source. Just recall atleast one sentence of those management lessons or articles. Let’s say “you should be punctual in your work” or “you should have good interpersonal skills as well” or “be a good listener while having a conversation” etc , well frankly speaking while having a conversation I make sure that I remember the last lesson but is it true in all the cases? Are we truly good listeners or are we really patient enough to deal with a specific situation or a particular person who is not turning out to be an asset for your organization? Are we really good at managing our works? Are we really working towards having a good work-life balance or we are just busy in earning rewarding points in numbers and in terms of money? This has become a serious question to think about and what is more important is to find the answer to the same.

There is an old saying “work to live, do not live to work”. Really? And how many of us are following the same. Are we really paying attention to our hobbies or our passion about doing a particular task what we love doing. For example I love reading and writing and to be true to my heart and soul after a month I have just sneaked from my work and  started with this blog, thoughts of which were travelling into my mind since few weeks. There is a very simple thumb rule which I apply to my work that I have to work for myself and for my betterment and for no one else. I don’t care if I do not get a promotion in the coming six months or if my employer did not notice my good work today. I want to go home with a satisfaction that whatever I have done today was rewarding for me in terms of attaining knowledge and increasing my abilities of working in a complicated or a given situation. Today I have learned to speak in front of my senior and give my fair views fearlessly; today I was able to work efficiently because whatever I learnt yesterday increased my level of thinking and today I am able to view a particular situation in a broader way and can analyze the same effectively and efficiently. Today I am able to act wisely and think quickly on my project work. This means that I grew as a person and I am much better than what I was yesterday and now I am satisfied that I grew as a professional and I have worked for myself and for my betterment. 

Do guys get stared at, for what they’re wearing to work?

The best part about including the sentence “interacting with people and observing their qualities” in your resume is that it supposedly creates a good impression on the interviewer. Alternatively, it might be your worst decision ever. If the person on the other side of the table calls your bluff, you’re done for.

Observation comes naturally to women. A girl’s BFF spends ages analyzing her attire, and has a critical overview of what her boyfriend drapes himself in. But. Wouldn’t it be fun for a guy to get stared at, for what he chooses to wear to work?

I tried to analyze how dating a guy could be different from profession to profession and here it goes:

Mechanical Engineers: “Handle with care”

I wanted to start with this profession as I have a typical mechanical engineer at my home as well and that’s my brother. No matter which college they get into and from which university they graduate from, their typical dominating mentality will prevail at all times but when you sit down and explain something, they will listen to you. Make sure you do not dominate these ME-s as they are already dominated by their machines. They want to get the things done in their own way but I am still confused between their technical ways and non technical ways. Even if they want to cut an onion or make a machine they will follow the same strategy and I am not sure whether they themselves understand that or not. Yes a positive trait of ME-s can be that they are very down to earth as they are always working on the machine attached to the ground. Bad joke I know!!

ME-s have their own world of imaginations which goes beyond making a machine to investing for the same and making money out of that. So on an all a mechanical engineer is although typically traditional but imaginative in his own technical or non- technical way. Well god knows what is that..

Dating an ME can be fun but it’s all up to you how you manage his traditional approach towards a woman.

Chartered Accounts: “Lost in calculation”
From my childhood days when I was even unaware of the pros and cons of being a CA, I was clear about one thing that no matter what, I will never marry a CA. And now I realize that I have a strong intuition. Well judging people with their profession is not good I know but I can’t help it. Profession leave a strong impact on a person’s behavior and so is true of this profession as well. A CA always messed up with the balance sheets and calculations will definitely come home with the same level of frustration until he knows how to manage work –life balance. His day will start with calculations and will end up with calculations.

Imagine a guy sitting in front of you talking about marriage plans and suddenly starting with calculations.“Well I think if your income is XXX lacs and my income is YYY lacs then in ZZZ years we can afford a world tour and for that you need to invest AAA lacs annually on which you will receive ROFL% interest and so on”.

Human Resource guys: “Date with due care”

I think chartered accountancy is much better if you do not want to be punished for the mistakes which you have not even committed. An HR guy can hang you for any reason and seriously you cannot win from him at any cost. He has answers for everything. In fact he has all the reasons to fight with you. Just dare to ask him a question. Despite of answering the question he will throw a question on you and that would be “Why” “What’s the need” and “why do you think I should answer this question” and moreover even if he answers your question he will never forget the question and will start making a report on the same as why the question was asked and what was the intention behind that.
Even if you are truthful he will definitely analyze the truth told by you and the moment he finds a clue he will start finding ways to fire you out. How can we forget that interviewing people is his job and not ours? But definitely girls will be girls.

 
Marketing Guys: “Brag away to glory”  

Just ask him, “honey how was your day” and he will start with his products and describing about the same. No matter his products are his services or any goods he has good explanation to all. Adding to that just try to win any argument from him. You will definitely get the answer on your own.
Ok go ahead and start fighting with him for not coming on time or showing up for the date. He would be ready with all his reasons for being late or not showing up for the date and within seconds he will melt you with his cheezy talks.

5. Doctors: “Take it easy, honey. They’re just doctors”

We girls have the biggest problem of getting flattered with the presence of one intelligent guy. They are intelligent because they have worked for the it and that’s the end of it!

Coming to a doctor’s trait if you really want to date a doctor you must attain one degree and that is “having patience”. Start dating a doctor and at the end of the day you will be half alike. At least you would be able to give medicines to your family members after that and for rest of the things your doc is there for you. I seriously do not understand why these doctor guys wants a doctor girl only. I mean seriously at the end of the day even if she doesn’t have the degree she will ultimately become a doctor after listening to him for the rest of the day after he comes home!! I remember one my my college professor prescribing medicines to her students and colleagues because her husband was a doctor. But no matter what she is the best person I  have ever met in my whole lifetime.

I think, while dating a doctor you really need to be a good listener and even if you are not then you gotta pretend to be one. Fake it until you make it and it couldn’t be truer for any other profession.

On a lighter note: This column does not aim to offend anybody’s personal religious opinions or faith. If you’re still offended, we encourage you to master the art of ignorance. 

Also featured on: http://blog.alphadigest.com/2015/09/25/do-guys-get-stared-at-for-what-theyre-wearing-to-work/